Beautiful Imperfection

So, I’ve been staying in the city for the last few days.. well, since I came back from the mountains xD.. I’m just lazy to go back to the “village” which is where I’m Staying at. I asked my mother for the apartment key, and I’m thinking of staying there for the next week or so.

Lots of things had happened in the last few days, not only I got my teeth done!! xD it’s like white now >.< and though I still need to come back to the dentist next week to get it even better, but I’m already happy that I don’t have to be shy when I’m smiling.. It’s not that I didn’t clean it, just that there was still some glue left from when I used to wear braces.

Oh! and My birthday is in a couple of days!! sigh, I’m gonna be twenty!! no longer a cute little teen boy I already used to be. T.T I don’t even know what I’m gonna do with my birthday, though since it’s not my 21st it shouldn’t be too grand anyway.. probably just a BBQ at my grandmother’s place. =3

well that’s about it. and BTW~ the picture on this post, though I found it from DeviantArt, is actually a picture of my apartment where I live right now.. so now you know~ =]

…that it would be easy for me…

Sometimes I dream that everything would be as how it used to be. Remember those times, before the hostility, before the pain, before the heart ache?

those days where we would hold our hands together, and wishing the night would never end? those times where I would look up into your eyes and know you would save my soul from the eternal fire? the times where I would honestly close my eyes and wish to the stars above to grant me ONE wish, which is to stop time and let everything stay as it was right then?

but alas.. all of those dreams didn’t come true, life got the best of us, breaking and shattering the dreams I had, slapping me to make me realize the cold hard reality that is our everyday life. well, I wished that I could turn back time now, and change oh so many things in the past.

no. I did not regret anything I’ve done.. just that I thought things would be better had I not made some of the choices I made back then. that I would not be the person suffering all this pain right now. Just if…………

Why I used to hate drinking.

It’s the fucking hangover + the-sickening-feeling-in-the-stomach + killer headache….

Anyways~! I went to this club last night, Apollo, Supposedly is a better place than the other alternative gay club we have here in Jakarta.. (there’s only two major ones – if there minor ones I don’t even know of their existence) and between the male hunky strippers, and flows of alcohol, and the not so bad looking crowd on the dance floor and bar, and everywhere around, I had fun! well, as some of you might know, It has been a while since I actually had any kind of fun at all, for the last couple of months. (I can’t dance in straight clubs)

Neeways, I might have gotten a little bit over excited last night, and was ecstatic over being with all these people, and under the influence of heavy alcohol, I might’ve looked like a fucking slut. but hell, next time I come there, I’ll be sure to keep my guard, and drink less… presumably..